I found this on a friends livejournal and gave it a run for itself.

Funny thing is… I lived in the midwest from 6th grade until I graduated high school. Of course, I made fun of anyone who called lunch “dinner” and dinner “supper” (and did you know that a “lunch” is a snack?). Of course, many people there “warsh” their hands too.

That’s why I moved to Warshington.

Yesterday was yard day at Casa de WWBD.

I started by digging a trench in the front yard for a retaining wall. About 3 years ago, we hit the yard with a kabota (a tractor with a back-hoe on the back and a bucket on the front). Our front yard sloped down from the street to the front of the house (we’re built on a hill) and was a pain in the ass to mow.

So… we converted it from one long slope into two flat terraces.

We put in a retaining wall along the longest side 2 years ago, but the going has been very slow (since I’ve been unable to do much due to my back). After my last surgery, I’ve finally been feeling up to it.

We also went and picked up 600 lb (272 kg) of Iron Mountain patio stone to place along the sidewalk edge of the upper part of the yard and will fill the rest with flowers and a Japanese maple. The lower section will be totally bricked for a patio. It should look all spiffy and stuffs when finished.

Today’s plan: Motorcycle ride!

My cousin, Shawn, is coming over shortly. He’s new to the motorcycle experience and wants to get some group riding in. So, we’re going to do a low speed tour of eastern Washington and western Idaho. Should be all kinds of fun! 🙂

Tomorrow’s Plan: Jury Duty
I’m scheduled to appear for jury selection tomorrow at 8am. While I seriously doubt that I’ll make the cut, I honestly want to do this. I’ve lived in this crap town for over 20 years and this is the first time they’ve ever summoned me to appear. It could make for some interesting experiences.

I haven’t had much to say for a bit.

Um… sorry. I lead a boring life.

So… I will attempt to jazz my life up a bit to entertain you, the humble reader. I will go out with my friends, drink heavily, go to the nudie bar, noisily return home at 3am, and attempt to get some lovin’ from the wife.

I will live on the edge (or in close proximity to it) just to make you happy.

Gone are those days when I live life as an average man… going to work, paying my bills, and stopping for pedestrians at cross walks. I will live life to the fullest, regardless of the consequences!

I begin my sojourn into the life of adventure by going to Wendy’s and ordering a bowl of chili. I will savor each and every bite, regardless of what’s in it.

In related news:
Anna Ayala (a.k.a. the “Wendy’s Chili Finger” lady) has been charged with attempted grand theft for the $2.5 million in losses the Wendy’s chain has suffered. She’s also charged with stealing $11,000 from a non-english speaking immigrant (she “sold” a trailer she didn’t own to someone who didn’t know any better).

It’s about damn time. Let this be a warning shot across the bow of scammers and con-artists who file frivolous lawsuits in their pursuit of the almighty dollar! If she’s found guilty, I hope that two things happen:

1. She gets the maximum possible sentance
2. Wendy’s sues her into the dirt

They need to freeze her assets right now so they can’t be disposed of.

I woke up around 5am this morning from a bad dream.

I dreamt that I was walking out of the store and caught someone siphoning the gas out of my car. A fight ensued, and they took off. In my dream, I tried to get in my car and chase them down, but I ran out of gas just as I got out of the parking lot.

Perhaps that’s my subconscious telling me that with the price of gas today, I should buy a locking gas cap.

Of course, if I believed in Freud, my gas tank would represent my mothers womb, the hose used to steal the gas would be my fathers penis, and the whole thing would mean that I was angry from being born (and I wanted to sleep with my sister).

Or something.

Note: with the price of gas nowadays, my wife wondered if stealing a full tank is now considered a felony.