An end to it all
I shut down my forum today.
That wasn’t an easy thing to do… I spend a lot of time there, but it’s not what it used to be.
Way back in the day when I started it up (3 some odd years ago), it was a fun place. We had a lot of good members who poked each other and laughed.
Now, it’s become a hate machine. People arguing with no intention to back down from their viewpoint no matter how inane has become the standard practice. We’ve lost some good members and every thread seems to break down after a few posts.
So… I pulled the plug.
I’ll probably reinstate it in a week or two, but I’m torn about keeping the current content. There’s a lot of anger in there. I might just wipe the slate clean.
It sucks that it’s down, but thinking about it now, it’s probably the right thing to do for the time being. Hopefully people can cool off and get back to the frame of mind that it’s just a damn forum people. Post fun and interesting shit and leave the arguments for another place. Maybe we need to just whack the Barbershop? Anyway, hope to see it back soon and back to some normality.
1Damn, now I’m going to have to actually work during the day 🙂
I didn’t cause any trouble to this did I?
2sorry for my contribution. Most of the time I tried to post something that wouldn’t descend into a quagmire of acrimony, but too often they did. I’ll try harder next time, I won’t take the bait when it happens. I’ll be a better user, I promise. Bring the forum back, I am already going through the DT’s.
3🙁
4Drat, there goes my escape from Reality!
5Hi Bio, been doing some thinking since the BRHF shutdown – eddie made a comment that got the gears moving and this is what I posted on his site:
Now I pry had a hand in the pot as well, certainly on the sensitivity side at times. As I pick through the pieces of my shattered social life (house dad with 3 small kids makes for a limited perspective), a couple of things come to mind:
1. I think the assumption/expectation with most forums is that they should be a place not unlike work or school, where you have a common objective (a lot of the folks at the BRHF are Lazy-I or Ex-Spectrum types), and thus talk within the parameters of a work environment – certain subjects are not touched because all know that it would hose up the esprit de corps (“working as a team” would be a grossly simple definition of that term) that a good organization requires to be successful.
Teh Intraweb is a different animal altogether. Here most of us who use it can put on only the persona they want others to see, if they were up to fooling folks – I’d like to think that most are more or less not putting up a front, but most of us net vets know better. What goes along with that perceived anonymity is the perceived license to do what we want, and that is a part of what can lead to the collapse of a forum. I’ve even seen a Christian forum get taken down because of that. And of course, since there is a high degree of plasticity on the web, someone who is tossed off can go somewhere else with virtually no harm no foul and start again – try doing that with work, school or home.
2. Relationships are dynamic animals. The longer a group of people are in the same area, the more of the real them comes to the surface, and conversely the more they can be shaped by that environment. Along with that, things happen to folks during the course of one’s life that changes how they look at the world. This will also be reflected in the persona that comes to the surface.
So whatta ya do with all this highfalutin’ drivel? First define the expectations for the forum which in the case of the BRHF was, I think, well defined. Second, enforce it. I think a lot of the issues could have been resolved with a little more hands-on moderating (even if I was the one getting my kiester slapped) before the plug was pulled…but that is just my opinion, I know you and Eddie are pretty busy folks.
Wish you all the best, Bio!
BuggZZZ
6I wasn’t much of a contributor…but it was still fun to read…bastards…
7To my mind, the priority here is to remove the baiting. I have baited and I have been baited in the forum. We all know the political and philosophical viewpoints of each other. We know sensitive spots each other posesses.
I never used to bring up my disdain for passive agressive Christians with political agendas until I kept getting the snide little remarks. Particularly from two individuals. The reason was the presumption that I wanted the dissent. If you doubt this, look into threads where I wasn’t even involved, yet my name was automatically thrust into the conversation. When I wasn’t even participating. Nice.
More than this there is an imperative toward respect. We are a group of (mostly) highly-educated individuals with a broad spectrum of experience and background. If you disagree, so be it. But do not dismiss the background and wisdom of others. Its not a smart practice in any walk of life, and here it is the trigger of the gun.
I don’t dain to try and advise anyone on the perils of combat or the best way to configure a server box. The reason is that I know you know these subjects better than I. What on earth might I be an authority on? I have a feeling many of you know, and to marginalize on me on that point is tantemount to pissing on my shoe. Its open and thoughtless disrespect.
Man, I’m Irish, and while I don’t subscribe to the implication that Irish are massive drunks, I will admit to have a temper that implores me to lay waste to my opposition. I get into the spirit of an argument easily. Too easily.
The question that this time-out is to inspire is whether we would rather continue with the combative nature of the discourse, or have the forum? Are we not here to participate in the debates and learn from each other, or are we to take a stand and defend it as if it were sport? I’ll take ownership of my part in it, but I’ll be damned if I’ll go down alone.
I never came to this forum, two long years ago, to get into pissing matches. I’d rather have civilized discussion and a group of friends to share news and ideas with. To amuse. To entertain.
8TONE YOUR ROCK……ONCE AGAIN THANKS FOR THE RECOVERY EFFORTS AND ALL THAT DAMN SMART BRAIN POWER OF YOURS………O AND THAT NICE ASS TO OF COURSE 😉 THANKS
9OK, Miftah, I’ll own my bit on the wrong presumption and provocation – as I said before, I know I’m part of the blame here. I too have Irish blood and the same combative nature (here is a little secret: combativeness is really part of the entire human race – different cultures handle it different ways). Therefore, I apologize to you and the rest of the gang for my part in the joint getting shut down.
10[refer to previous comment:]
…as well as for flogging on you.
11Good lord, Bio, if you don’t bring the forum back, apparently we’ll just start threads in your comments.
12In large part I feel a lot of responsibility for Bio taking the forum down. I think the thread that I started this last time descended into something that I am not proud of, that wasn’t my intent, but in the end that’s what happened.
I put up a picture that I wanted feedback on, I was only looking to try to understand what the picture was portraying. My daugher saw the picture one way, I saw it another, I was looking to try to find out what others thought. I like the picture, it has an appeal to me, and obviously my daughter likes it too. I was suprised at the response that I got, that the picture was crap, and the artist not worthy of calling it art. I took offense to that, it seemed like a personal attack directed at me and my daughter.
The thing that *I* did wrong in the situation was to take it personally and respond to the viewpoint of another by preaching. Its a bad habit that I have. In the future (if there is one), you can be sure that I won’t do that. I’ll just not respond. I’ll say I am sorry this time for my actions, I baited, poked with a stick and got down right insulting. In a strange way, I felt hurt by the response, and I reacted instead of thinking.
I am stepping up to say I am sorry to Bio. I think we hurt him more than we were hurt. We deserve our spanking on this one. We ALL stepped in it a bit. I am not trying to shed responsiblity here. I commit to making the forum a better place (if it comes back), but my commitment alone won’t do it, we ALL have to step up.
Can’t we all just be friends?
13I know I probably posted a couple comments that provoked (sp) people…and I am sorry for that. If I cause any trouble let me know and send me to a corner. 🙂
14That sucks that you took it down Bio…hopefully it is up and running again soon..laterz
15Wtf? Did I miss something?
How will I chat with all you sexy rexy boys now? 🙁
16PS Kirstin=Moxie
17…For those who might not have known that.
18K I’m done now
😀
19BWBDs living will
Loved ones,
I, the above fourm being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means.
Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of peckerwood
ethically challenged politicians who couldn’t pass ninth-grade biology
if their lives depended on it.
If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to sit up and ask for
A glass of fine Napa Pinot, cold beer, Margarita,
Bloody Mary, Martini, Rum & Coke, shot of Wild Turkey, a cold beer or whatever it
should be presumed that I won’t ever get better. When such a
determination is reached, I hereby instruct my spouse, children and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes, and call it a day.
Under no circumstances shall the hypocritical members of the
Legislature (State or Federal) enact a special law to keep me on life-support machinery. It is my wish that these boneheads mind their own damn business, and payattention instead to the health, education and future of the millions of Americans who aren’t in a permanent coma.
Under no circumstances shall any politicians butt into this case.
I don’t care how many fundamentalist votes they’re trying to scrounge
for their run for the presidency, it is my wish that they play politics
with someone else’s life and leave me alone to die in peace.
I couldn’t care less if a hundred religious zealots send e-mails to
legislators in which they pretend to care about me. I don’t know them,
and I certainly haven’t authorized them to preach and crusade on my
behalf. They should mind their own damn business.
If any of my family goes against my wishes and turns my case into a
political cause, I hereby promise to come back from the grave and make
his or her existence a living hell.
_____________________
Signature
DATE__________
_______________________________________
20Witness
ok im stuck on page https://whitewomanblackdog.com/?p=355
21thats where im stuck hummmmmmm?